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by lovserm



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Crushes, Cute, Feelings, First Kiss, Gay, Getting Together, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Possibly OOC, Theyre like 15-16, my first fic in this fandom, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-15 01:48:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28555626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovserm/pseuds/lovserm
Summary: Armin loves Eren, but questions if Eren returns these persistent feelings.
Relationships: Armin Arlert & Eren Yeager, Armin Arlert/Eren Yeager
Comments: 9
Kudos: 67





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**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfic in this fandom, hope you enjoy it!

''Dear diary,  
Eren still doesn't know... The only thing I want to do is tell him how I feel, but I know he doesn't like me. All he ever does is drool over Mikasa. It's so frustrating! I can only think about him, I hate it! I wonder if this is how Marco felt before he confessed to Jean.. Or was it Jean who confessed to him? Eren's coming over later, I wonder how terrible this is going to go...  
Signed, Armin~''

Armin sighed as he adjusted his shirt collar and swiftly shut his book, head clouded with thoughts of Eren. How did he catch these overbearing feelings? Why was his fate planned in such an awful way that could only lead to him making a fool of himself and/or pushing Eren away? Why did he of all people get randomly chosen to pine over Eren, his childhood best-friend!?

He shook his head as if he could rid himself of the devious stories he was crafting in his mind that involved him and the lucky boy that reeled in his heart on a hook.

The timid boy waited, sat in the middle of his bed with his arms crossed and a nervous blush painted on his sun-kissed face. He snuck his secret notebook under his pillow, believing Eren wouldn't be able to find it, purposefully or accidentally.

Eren was scheduled to arrive at 2:30 PM so they could study together and maybe play some videogames on Armin's PS4. Eren had suggested coming over out-of-the-blue and Armin had never stuttered so badly in his life, not even when his anxiety was peaking through the roof. The poor boy's face was red-hot like an oven, he swore he could see steam rising from his entire body!

The minutes dragged out as slow as possible as he tugged on the end of his sweater. To pass the time, he picked up a book he was reading the night before.

The title reads 'Broken Promises'. It was a drama-romance about a gay couple who had to survive high school without exposing their relationship to the burning heat of the public. He tried his best to keep the fact he owned that book secret. He mentally noted that he should put the book back when he's done with his short reading session.

Despite all the fantasies Armin subconsciously creates, he figured that in the end, he was hopeless. Eren and Mikasa would grow up, start dating, and live a happy life. Armin would give them endless support along the way but he eventually would be on the sidelines. He'd just be a friendly acquaintance. A forgotten memory.

He began to shale, his eyes growing foggy with unshed tears. He deeply cared about his two best friends, he didn't want them to leave, even if that means sticking around while Mikasa gets to be with Eren. ''Gosh, I really have it bad..'' He muttered to himself, sniffling a bit and wiping his eyes dry.

He scratched the back of his head, opting to turn a page when suddenly...

'Ding, dong!'

The doorbell rang.

Armin felt a wave of love-sick nausea crash over him, causing him to hold his stomach. The butterflies he always got when Eren was around returned. To Armin, hell would be an understatement for it.

The annoying chime continued to break the once peaceful atmosphere of the house. Armin rose to his feet, but the cheesy boys-love book in the first place he could think of (which happened to be in the bottom draw of his bedside table) and started treading to the door.

When the short boy opened the door, he had to suppress a gasp. Eren looked absolutely stunning, as usual. 'I have it worse than I thought..'. Armin could've passed out on that very spot, but he willed himself to calm down and closed his eyes while he took a small, self-reassuring breath.

''Hey, Armin!'' Eren greeted, looking rather pleased to be with his best friend.

''A-Uhm... Hi, Eren! You should come inside, it's kinda cold out here..!''

Straight away, Eren suspected that something was wrong. It was almost motherly instinct at this point, he always knew when something was on the younger boy's mind. Creepy as it is, Eren had memorized every single little sign that something was off with him. He had been a bit concerned with Armin because he realized that Armin wasn't acting like his usual calm(-ish), light-hearted, observant self. He wasn't being the Armin that Eren had grown to know and love.

Quickly, Armin mumbled out an 'I'm fine..!'' and to that Eren hummed. He didn't believe him in the slightest but didn't want to press on anymore about it (even if he was curious to know what could be so important or troubling that Armin was acting weird about it for, like, a month, or maybe even two!)

The peace in the air was broken not once. It remained peace-filled, relaxing. Until...

''Armin.''

Armin jumped and covered his chest, his heart hammering in his chest while he mentally cursed at himself. He had been so caught up in gently caressing the brunette's face with his crystal-like blue eyes that he hadn't realized that Eren had put down the book and was looking at him with a confused expression.

''Wh-What!? I'm so sorry, E-Eren!-''

''Huh? What are you freaking out about? I was just going to ask if you could explain something, it looks like complete rubbish and I don't get it. I swear, this crappy book goes against everything we've learned-''

At this point, Armin tuned him out. He immediately calmed down after Eren stated that he only needed something to be explained. Inside, his heart was still beating a million miles a minute and he felt like he was being roasted on an open flame. 'It's what's on the outside that counts, I guess!' he thought as he forced a small smile.

He took the textbook from Eren's soft. gorgeous, perfect hand and started reading the bit Eren had said looked like 'complete rubbish', and did his best to explain what it was to him.

All of a sudden, Eren's phone pinged. The taller to opened the notification and laughed, typing on his phone. Guilt, frustration, and confusion seeped into Armin's mind, like poison from a deadly snake bite. A million questions swam in his head, He could answer one on the spot though.

'It's Mikasa,' he thought bitterly.

Despite him loving Mikasa like a sister, he couldn't help but feel angered by her butting in every time he and Eren were alone. He would never dare act on these emotions. He despised himself for even having them. He felt like a big enough burden already and he didn't want to make his friends' lives worse by being a baby who couldn't control his emotions.

Eren laughed again, that beautiful sound paralyzing Armin for a moment. In fact, it was Armin's favorite sound. Usually, it filled him to the brim with joy, but this time it made him huff with jealousy. He had no clue on how to feel at that moment, but he knew overall that he was feeling.. terrible.

He knew he'd never be as pretty or as smart as Mikasa. He knew he'd never had a shot.

But something inside of him longed for Eren's touch, Eren's affection, Eren's love, so much that it ached. When he really thought about it, Armin felt like he should at least tell Eren so he didn't live his whole life knowing he kept something so big from Eren, from his first friend, from the most important person in his life. The last thing he wanted is to push Eren away but... Telling him would take the guilt-inforcing weight off of his shoulders. He knew Eren wouldn't react too badly. Well, he hoped he wouldn't. If he was lucky, Eren would let them be friends and they'd carry on as normal. If he was really lucky, they would start dating! But in Armin's mind, the bad outcomes overweighed the good outcomes..

''Sorry, Armin! It's Mikasa, just gimme a sec..!'' Eren apologized, continuing to tap the cracked phone screen.

''It's fine, Eren. I'll be right back.'' Armin uttered, clearly not looking too pleased. Eren's eyes followed him, sorrow lurking in his olive orbs.

He was deeply worried about Armin.

The younger hopped off the bed and dragged himself to the bathroom. Eren glanced at him, sighing softly. Armin heard the noise but ignored it. He was tired of all of this. He wanted these stupid feelings to go away.

Eren looked at the ruffled blanket from where Armin was previously sat. He wanted- No, NEEDED to know what was wrong with Armin. H cared about the small, cute blonde more than anything and he made sure that he knew that, so why wouldn't he just tell him what's wrong? 

Mindlessly, Eren's hand slid under Armin's plump pillow and grasped a hard object that was seemingly hidden under there. He slowly pulled it out, revealing a... A diary?

Eren chuckled and let his hand run over the smooth finish of the leather. He warily opened to the first page, not reading, he was rather just observing Armin's beautiful handwriting, how it imperfectly formed each letter perfectly. It was like everything about Armin was naturally beautiful... Eren flipped to the most recent page and straight away, he noticed that his name was written in Armin's cursive handwriting. His emotion overpowered his logic, he was intrigued, he just had to know what Armin had to say about him that he couldn't say to his face.

He decided to read it.

Eren's finger followed the pattern of flattering words, Eren's brain delaying the process of taking the information in.

He didn't understand in the slightest what Armin was saying! Well, he knew but he didn't understand; his brain wouldn't comprehend the news. He was trying his best to untangle his thoughts, but his efforts were rendered useless. Nothing made sense. 'Is this why Armin's been acting strange?'

Then, Eren's heart dropped.

''Eren..!?''

Eren jumped, throwing the book of secrets into his lap abruptly with a soft *thump!* and darting his eyes over to Armin, who was clearly pale and clearly blushing bright red.

He tried to say something, anything, but all that came out was broken syllables. Armin was no better, coming to terms with the fact that he may soon have to let out all of his love troubles that had been bothering him for God knows how long. Both boys kept their eye-contact, both too nervous to break it.

''Eren, I don't know what you read but I'm sorry. I get in the way of everything and I'm-'' Armin rambled, voice cracking as he started hyperventilating which was a crystal clear sign that he was going to cry. However, Eren interrupted him.

''Armin.. You... Have feelings for me?''

Armin silently swore at the world for its cruel antics. He wanted to crawl under a rock and perish right then and there. No longer looking Eren in the eye, he lightly edged over to the bed and picked up the book, hands trembling slightly. He had his eye squeezed shut in shame, the tears being held in and short sobs being let out in shaky breaths, trying to mask his crying with him just breathing shakily. Eren gazed up at him from his spot on the bed. He was burning up, feeling sick, heart clenching in pain.

''Armin...'' He tried to force more words out but nothing, nothing at all came out, no matter how hard he tried.

Armin shook his head, only wanting Eren to leave so he didn't have to see how upset, confused, and troubled he looked. Armin stood helplessly, waiting for his best friend to lash out at him, leave, just do anything! He couldn't stand the booming silence it nade it unbelievably tense and it made it impossible for him to tune out his drumming heart.

''I'm sorry, Eren... I'm the worst, I don't deserve to breathe the same air as someone amazing like you... You can leave, I don't mind... It's probably for the best, It wasn't supposed to end up like this...'' Armin whispered, voice wavering while he masked his helpless look with a smile. The sight made Eren's heart clench agonizingly.

''No, no, no, Armin...'', Eren finally brought himself to stand up and pull Armin's frail body into a bone-crushing hug. He didn't say anything, he just stood there and held the adorable boy in his arms. It was like a breath of fresh air for them both. He ever-so-slowly guided them to the bed, where he sat down and gently pulled Armin onto his lap. He tried to stay calm as Armin started sobbing. He held back his own cries and hushed Armin, murmuring loving words to the blonde. Armin was conflicted on the inside. ''How could you play with me like this? Just reject me, stop sugar-coating the situation! You don't like me and that's that..! It'll only make me feel worse in the end..''

Eren was astonished that Armin would ever think something so... Bizzare! 

''Armin, how could you even think that..!? Don't you get it?'', Eren gripped Armin's cheeks and brought his head away from his chest. Armin looked so miserable, so distraught, so... Broken.

''I love you, Armin Arlert.. I've loved you since the day I first met you..! I thought you were smart enough to notice..! I've been dropping hints to you for, like, years, dummy..!''

Armin was stunned, piercing Eren's chocolate eyes with his ocean ones which were hazy from his crying. The thing that snapped him out of his trance was Eren grabbing his waist and in his gorgeous voice he murmured:

''Can I.. Kiss you?''

Armin's heart exploded in thousands of pieces, his whole being tingling and tears of appreciation rolling down his round cheeks, his eyes sparkling with how wet they were. Armin nodded, taking in every feature on Erens precious face as if it was the last time he would ever see him. And finally, they kissed. Something they had both been wanting for years.

It was better than either of them had ever thought it would be, it was more perfect than it was in either of theirs' wildest dreams. Fireworks went off in their heads as they each adjusted, feeling floaty, knowing this was where they were destined to be. The two boys held each other tightly, feeling on top of the world.

Finally, they were together.  
Finally, they were happy.

Finally, they were home.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a kudos or a comment! Feel free to point out any mistakes! I welcome criticism if you have any, hate of any form will be deleted
> 
> Hope you liked it!


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